April 2008

[Birdman]

It’s mind numbing to think that these imbeciles have actually ever been to Amsterdam because they have absolutely nothing in common with the government or the people of Amsterdam. IMO most of these pathetic jerk offs are butt-ugly fat asses or dullards who have a unhealthy interest in marijuana and need to finally get laid by something other than their right-hand. They sit in a coffeeshop, smoke weed, think about how great everything is but don’t have the mental capability of to equate that it is the policies of the Dutch government that have made everything so peaceful and free. The beliefs of these buffoons is so far removed from the majority of the residents of Amsterdam that it’s probably best that they just smoke their weed and keep their mouths shut as to not offend anyone with their thickheaded, simplistic, self-serving ideals. Then after smoking themselves silly and getting their dick wet a few times, they return to their pathetic lives in America and their mundane existence having taken nothing from their experience.

[Banks]

Speaking of…So I take my first big shelf shit of the trip and I flush and the thing won’t budge. So the tank refills and I flush and the turd won’t move. So again I flush, no luck, and again no luck and again and then I grab the shower and point it at the pile and blast that thing down and I’m like great. So now we have to lay a paper towel down on the shelf when we take a crap so that we can pull it off the shelf. Shit happens.

Great report so far! Keep them coming!

[a bollocks]

IT'S BUSTALOAD!

[moe.]

Maybe you just need a bit more fiber in your diet. ;^) Have a great time man. I was I was there toking a few with you.

moe.

[chigusa]

isn't there a turd stick somewhere about the place? you know, to push it down with.

[Birdman]

Speaking of bustaload…so I leave the party and Last Hamlet stops by in the morning and tells me that he and two chicks were invited back to the pad of another male forum member. After getting to the pad one of the chicks and this male forum member, who will forever remain anonymous disappear. Apparently, when the two were alone, the chick pulls down her pants and says, “Fuck me in the ass and spank me.� The guy couldn’t say no and when he’s in the act she shits all over him, the room, etc. Now this is just a secondhand rumor and Last Hamlet didn’t see it, but he claims to have smelled it. Shit continues to happen.

[Banks]

Speaking of bustaload…so I leave the party and Last Hamlet stops by in the morning and tells me that he and two chicks were invited back to the pad of another male forum member. After getting to the pad one of the chicks and this male forum member, who will forever remain anonymous disappear. Apparently, when the two were alone, the chick pulls down her pants and says, “Fuck me in the ass and spank me.� The guy couldn’t say no and when he’s in the act she shits all over him, the room, etc. Now this is just a secondhand rumor and Last Hamlet didn’t see it, but he claims to have smelled it. Shit continues to happen.

This is shaping up to be the best trip report ever...

[bongwata]

Wow... Ratso Rizzo!

BW

[YuckyDog]

these stories are hillarious.. keep them coming birdman. lol

[des]

one of the chicks and this male forum member, who will forever remain anonymous

I'm sure we'll be able to work it out when Last Hamlet writes his trip report! LOL

Peace, Des.

[Planning-A-Trip]

HAHAHAH funny stuff. Guess I left that party 5 minutes too soon.

[Birdman]

So we rent a car with Dannymac and his wife Joan. We stop in Leiden and all the coffeeshops are closed so off to Den Haag and we smoke in Coffeeshop Cramer and eat at Deluca’s and then off to Antwerp through rush hour traffic and we park and walk around and eat at Zeppos and go to De Kulminator and Danny and Koopa buy 10 year old beers and drink them. Then we smoke a blunt and get back to the car and I can’t seem to get out of the city. Every turn is a dead end. I don’t know if I’m going east, west whatever and it’s drizzling out and there’s this bus just sitting there and I drive up and Koopa asks him how to get to ring 1, A2 Amsterdam and I can see the bus driver thinking real hard how to direct us and Danny says, “This isn’t going to be easy.� Then the bus driver says, “You can follow me and I will direct you.� So he pulls out and we follow him. He has passengers and a couple of times he stops and picks up people all the time with us behind him. Eventually at a light he motions for me to pull up along side him. He rolls down his window and tells us to go straight through the light and make a right and follow signs. So the light turns green and I go straight ahead and I see him chase after me flashing his lights and he catches me and explains that I should have turned back at the light. It seemed funny at the time.

[mobiljenny]

Then the bus driver says, “You can follow me and I will direct you.� So he pulls out and we follow him. He has passengers and a couple of times he stops and picks up people all the time with us behind him. Eventually at a light he motions for me to pull up along side him. He rolls down is window and tells us to go straight through the light and make a right and follow signs. So the light turns green and I go straight ahead and I see him chase after me flashing his lights and he catches me and explains that I should have turned back at the light. It seemed funny at the time.

You just made my day.

Thanks for taking the time to share. Loved the stories.
CJ

[markcheech]

great shitty fun report!

seriously sounds like all good times.. cept for gettin shitted on.

[dannymac]

...Then we smoke a blunt and get back to the car and I can’t seem to get out of the city. Every turn is a dead end. I don’t know if I’m going east, west whatever and it’s drizzling out and there’s this bus just sitting there and I drive up and Koopa asks him how to get to ring 1, A2 Amsterdam and I can see the bus driver thinking real hard how to direct us and Danny says, “This isn’t going to be easy.� Then the bus driver says, “You can follow me and I will direct you.� So he pulls out and we follow him. He has passengers and a couple of times he stops and picks up people all the time with us behind him. Eventually at a light he motions for me to pull up along side him. He rolls down his window and tells us to go straight through the light and make a right and follow signs. So the light turns green and I go straight ahead and I see him chase after me flashing his lights and he catches me and explains that I should have turned back at the light. It seemed funny at the time.

We're talkin' 'bout a full size city bus, after midnight, and a carload of buzzed americans asking for directions to Amsterdam.
When he started picking up passengers, all I could imagine was him laughing all the while...
ultimately though, I was the one laughing to the point of tears. It was that damn funny at the time.
The 10 year old beer, the blunt, and the good company, coulda' had something to do with it though.

And Birdy' forgot to mention...
We arrive back in Amsterdam a bit after 02:00hr and driving down the length of Overtoom, with no available parking spot anywhere - until we pull up to the rental agency. As luck would have it there was one singular spot, to which Birdy' expertly pulled into.
Off we walked to our hotel, as Birdman & Koopa rode off to their apartment.

A perfect ending for our road trip.

[Birdman]

So Koopa says to me, "Should I trade in my bike?" His bike had been squealing something fierce. I say, "Shit dude, my bike also squeals." And Koopa says, "Yeah but not into submission saying, 'who's this 500 pound girl riding me?'"

[chichi123]

We just got back from 10 days in the Bahamas. God almighty my very own toilet never felt so good. I have some nice muscles on the front of my legs from a lifetime of not sitting on foreign toilets.


btw, I had a kid that used to plug the toilet and I would make him go get a stick and poke it down. Having kids sure levels ya out.


Cheech

[koopa]

We just got back from 10 days in the Bahamas. God almighty my very own toilet never felt so good. I have some nice muscles on the front of my legs from a lifetime of not sitting on foreign toilets.


btw, I had a kid that used to plug the toilet and I would make him go get a stick and poke it down. Having kids sure levels ya out.


Cheech

that muscle toning method really puts a double entendre in the phrase "doing squats" doesn't it!

[Birdman]

Photos

None of any Channelites and none of Sir Ian of Tokesville, that's for sure!

[TAK]

LOL

Dag
TAK

[dannymac]

Nice photos Birdy'

[Planning-A-Trip]

great pics Birdman.

[koopa]

Sweet Pics Man.

[smokedpeppers]

.........LOL on the foto's, great tulip shots!

[Sir Ian of Tokesville]

Photos

None of any Channelites and none of Sir Ian of Tokesville, that's for sure!

I'm sorry, secretive bugger aren't I ?
I notice that very few Brits have ever allowed their image to appear on the Channels.

There's a whole new thread in that some time.

What I should have said was, 'include me in your photo's, but please don't post them if you are going to have me in them''
I have takien the decision to become 'known' by attending meet-ups from internet forums several times. I draw the line there. I'm probably not alone on this, although I can see that others do no have similar concerns. I think that probably it is a Brit thing, as well as a personal thing for me. We have so much surveilance here in the UK and draconian pot laws, it pays to be a little discreet about just how you pass an idle hour or two of your own heavily monitored lives. It ain't the best country to be a toker, which is why I venture to Holland so frequently and why it is my intention, to quietly continue to do unhindered for the foreseeable future.

It was great to put faces to names at Katsu and subequently the party. I will try to remember each of you I met and you can be sure if anyone does post pictures of Channelites, I will be first to click on the post and remind myself of all of your faces, which is pretty unfair in my own book.
Hopefully not too many years will pass before I see some of you again and hopefully I will have not faded from your memory so badly you fail to remember me.
Also I think part of the fun of meeting up with Channelites, is the not knowing who you gonna get from who you imagined they would be.
//Bows out //

[Birdman]

Sir Ian of Tokesville

[Sir Ian of Tokesville]

You bastard !. . . yeah thats me, David Crosby , how did you get that shot ?

[Birdman]

You bastard !. . . yeah thats me, David Crosby , how did you get that shot ?

LMAO! Well, you have that quintessential hippie look.

[koopa]

Sir Ian of Tokesville

Sir Ian, Stills, and Hash would be a fine musical trio!

or Sir Ian, Stills, Hash, and Young if you prefer.

[uk*bag*lady]

I'm sorry, secretive bugger aren't I ?
I notice that very few Brits have ever allowed their image to appear on the Channels.

I just posted one of myself in the Bar

And if anyone would like an enlargement to hang above a fireplace I'd be happy to help

:-)