JULIET wrote:
What happens if you're constipated?
Excuse me for the nauseatingly apposite and vivid idiom, but are you not batting on something of a sticky wicket here?
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chichi123 wrote:Jesus I never sit on a public toilet ever. I put tissure first into the water so it doesn't spray up then I hover at a hopefully unspraying distance. I went in one today that had the seat covers on a convayer belt and couldn't be arsed to fuck with it and did the hover act.
This tactic is very healthy for the leg muscles. Once I remember being pregnant and my legs were a quivering like I was a shitting razer blades and suddenly I had to sit. I was mortified and almost in tears. But wtf I lived to tell such a fantastic story.
Dazzler wrote:JULIET wrote:
What happens if you're constipated?
Excuse me for the nauseatingly apposite and vivid idiom, but are you not batting on something of a sticky wicket here?
JULIET wrote:Dazzler wrote:JULIET wrote:
What happens if you're constipated?
Excuse me for the nauseatingly apposite and vivid idiom, but are you not batting on something of a sticky wicket here?
No - cos the funny thing is I always suffer from constipation when I go on my hols!
That's what made Mikey O's story so ridiculous!
JULIET wrote:Dazzler wrote:JULIET wrote:
What happens if you're constipated?
Excuse me for the nauseatingly apposite and vivid idiom, but are you not batting on something of a sticky wicket here?
No - cos the funny thing is I always suffer from constipation when I go on my hols!
That's what made Mikey O's story so funny!
Dazzler wrote:JULIET wrote:Dazzler wrote:JULIET wrote:
What happens if you're constipated?
Excuse me for the nauseatingly apposite and vivid idiom, but are you not batting on something of a sticky wicket here?
No - cos the funny thing is I always suffer from constipation when I go on my hols!
That's what made Mikey O's story so funny!
What a delight you are.
Swin wrote:chichi123 wrote:Jesus I never sit on a public toilet ever. I put tissure first into the water so it doesn't spray up then I hover at a hopefully unspraying distance. I went in one today that had the seat covers on a convayer belt and couldn't be arsed to fuck with it and did the hover act.
This tactic is very healthy for the leg muscles. Once I remember being pregnant and my legs were a quivering like I was a shitting razer blades and suddenly I had to sit. I was mortified and almost in tears. But wtf I lived to tell such a fantastic story.
This reminds me of a poem often seen scrawled on cubicle doors public toilets in UK
'It's no good standing on the seat
The crabs in here can jump six feet
It's no good going round next door
The crabs in there jump ten feet more'
Incidentally I am currently (re)reading a suberb little book called 'Secret Amsterdam' by Marjolijn van Eys and Delphine Robiot (published by Jonglez if anyone fancies buying a copy)
It's absolutely superb - one of the best books about Amsterdam I have ever seen - a guide book really but as the title implies 200 'secret' or little known things and places to see spread over nine areas of the city.
After 50+ visits spread over 44 years at least 100 of them were totally unknown to me including back on topic here) the toilets at the Cobra cafe at the Rijksmuseum end of Museum Plein near those 'IAMSTERDAM' letters.
Apparently the toilet cubicle doors are transparent and don't become opaque until you lock the door!
Could be very un-nerving I would have thought - enough to bind you up for the whole holiday
Swin wrote:Incidentally I am currently (re)reading a suberb little book called 'Secret Amsterdam' by Marjolijn van Eys and Delphine Robiot (published by Jonglez if anyone fancies buying a copy)
It's absolutely superb - one of the best books about Amsterdam I have ever seen - a guide book really but as the title implies 200 'secret' or little known things and places to see spread over nine areas of the city.
After 50+ visits spread over 44 years at least 100 of them were totally unknown to me including back on topic here) the toilets at the Cobra cafe at the Rijksmuseum end of Museum Plein near those 'IAMSTERDAM' letters.
Apparently the toilet cubicle doors are transparent and don't become opaque until you lock the door!
Could be very un-nerving I would have thought - enough to bind you up for the whole holiday
MileHighDenver wrote:Swin wrote:Incidentally I am currently (re)reading a suberb little book called 'Secret Amsterdam' by Marjolijn van Eys and Delphine Robiot (published by Jonglez if anyone fancies buying a copy)
It's absolutely superb - one of the best books about Amsterdam I have ever seen - a guide book really but as the title implies 200 'secret' or little known things and places to see spread over nine areas of the city.
After 50+ visits spread over 44 years at least 100 of them were totally unknown to me including back on topic here) the toilets at the Cobra cafe at the Rijksmuseum end of Museum Plein near those 'IAMSTERDAM' letters.
Apparently the toilet cubicle doors are transparent and don't become opaque until you lock the door!
Could be very un-nerving I would have thought - enough to bind you up for the whole holiday
Theres another called "Amsterdam Irregulars". Mostly photo's but also many well kept secrets of the city. My partners garden is featured in it.
patrick wrote:Yes Alpha I have noticed what a dick head I am here daily. But thank you for pointing out the obvious.
Just remember I am a stupid coward who can't control himself.
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